The first thing is to imagine Big!😍
I learned this technique while reading my first book of healing, a subject I had greatly depreciated before that.
Quantum physics, Buddhists and tantra explain that we attract what we are, demystifying that “opposites attract”: if I am bitter … why would a cheerful person approach? If I’m clean and elegant … why would a grungy hippie invite me out? And so on … Pretty basic if you analyze it a bit.👏
So, instead of pointing your finger and complaining that “they are all the same” or giving you a chance in the hope that it will change, look how you are.
And the people around you! It can be exasperating to see yourself reflected in them, but it is also liberating because it means that if you change those people little by little will leave your life (which can be painful but it is worth it!) And others will arrive.
Before criticizing and horrifying you with all your “unattractive” characteristics, focus on the positive.❤
Set the place, put relaxed music, and if you dare dance or jump for the energy to move and start to imagine your ideal partner in detail!😁
When you have a clear idea, write all the features in a list, style:
Explayate! The more you write the easier!
- cheerful
- entrepreneur
- carefree
- nice
- interesting
- smart
- spiritual seeker
- respectful
- And so on…
Now analyze how much of that you have …
Check each feature and think if someone would describe you like that.
If you already have all those adjectives on yourself, you just have to wait … but if not you have to put together an action plan to acquire them, remember that “we attract what we are”, based in our example list:
• To be cheerful you have to have a sense of humour and that is cultivated or learned: doing clown or theatre, for example, could be a good idea. To laugh at oneself or make a fool of yourself is great medicine, it allows you to face daily life more easily.🤡
• Start a simple project and finish it, write a blog, paint, take pictures and give them away. Suggest helping one person per day, or whatever is appropriate, but start and finish.🏆
• Practice meditation, read “The power of now” by Eckart Tolle or do dance therapy. A discipline that allows you to be in the present, instead of being worried about the mental mambo.🧘♀️
• Be nice! I smiled at all the people I cross on the street, at the beginning was forced (the muscles of the face were not used!) But with practice, fun things can happen.😊
• Become interesting. Search inside yourself, ask yourself what you like to do and research the subject or take an online course. Become an expert.✈
• For me, intelligence is related to books, so read and turn off the TV for a while!📚
• I’m a spiritual person so I can´t imagine to be with someone who will fight back every time I speak about energy or the Universe. Be clear of your limits.🕉
• Do you respect life? Animals? Humans? Environment? Observe yourself for one day, every time you feel you are in a way you would like to change, write it down, the first step comes with self-awareness.
Obviously, nothing is immediate, it takes time, but the key is that you will know more about YOU. Your first and most important partner!
Going out of the comfort zone, doing new activities and putting on challenges make you discover other possibilities to be. Your personality is a “mask” that you choose (for a thousand reasons, it does not matter now!).
Give yourself the opportunity to explore and play with other options of how you can live.
The proof that it works is experience, there is no other option to try and be encouraged to change.
If you still want to read, I’ll tell you mine history.
After doing this exercise I understood that I was very far from the man you see in the first photo.
I decided to move, stop living in the mountains, where the cultural offer was limited and I returned to the city. I danced all styles: butoh, contemporary and tango, I played the clown art and did physical theatre. I took part in a dance therapy workshop with Maria Fux and I attended another where I learned how to put together a dance therapy class. I also did a singing course!
I loved to dance and sing but I was ashamed, very serious and self-critical, I wanted to let myself flow and play. It helped a lot, speaking in public become easier and dancing, even alone, was fun!
In six months I did everything that I had always wanted, they were the best moments of my life.
Then, I flew to France and went to work and study in Paris. It was nine months of internal work, self-knowledge and exploration. In June I would take a flight that would join me with my friends in Australia, but it never happened. I took the flight without having a stay visa, and in the previous stop to Sydney, Singapore I was stranded …
The turns led me to decide to travel to learn, so I studied Thai massage in Pai, Thailand for two months until …
Everything had its reward, in September 2018, I would find the Yoga University that would give course and colour to mine path. One of my teachers, the one with the most beautiful smile, is now my partner and the love of my life.
Thank you for reading my experience!
I hope you feel inspired and ready to self-work! Let me know how it was!
Did you enjoy and want to give back? I love to learn with online courses!
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Love! 🖤
